It’s those some times
When in the quintessential hush
You whisper
From a broken raspy throat
Crackling through the silence
As though parched and raked over
Burning coals, over
Scorching summer sands
And into those silences of the desert
Your agonizing cracked voice
That has been silenced
By fate perchance
For so long
It has so much to say
It longs to, but nay
The silence of the desert
Offers no solace, no oasis
Yet you whisper
It speaks of strength
That you’re so hardened
That only you know, it’s an illusion;
Where they see courage
I see the desperation
I see you’re broken
Because I’ve been there too
The ageless quietude
Of whispering
Of wetting the throat with emotions
Buried somewhere far but not forgotten
Of wetting chapped lips with blood
That you wished was not a figment
Of your imagination
You bleed within and wonder
Why it all never bleeds out
But like a rot on the inside
It gnaws at you, it clings on, it clots
And you scrape it out
With harsh rasping sounds
And guttural cries and howls
Your throat is hoarse
Because you have so much to say
But no one to tell
So you tell the silent air
The forbidden secrets you hope
It will share
You hope that one day
You’ll get there
I won’t lie and say it’ll be fine
But it will get better with time
Your lies, your self-deception
Your ability to hide the pain
To hide yourself
From not just the world
But from yourself
– Akanksha Gupta